Introducing Maia Elicia

Born at 3am on Saturday 24th April, weighing in at 3230g, a little under 7lbs, is the beautiful, dark, hungry and cute Maia Elicia.

Señor Barnes

El Conde de Cabalitto, Señor Barnes.

Entry on Iain and Bex's visit next, but Señor Barnes more than deserves his own space. Owner, inspiration behind and charming front man of La Epoca, Señor Barnes offers the best shave in Buenos Aires. An afficionado of the cut throat razor, in the best possible way, his barberia hides in the oft unvisited but hidden gem of a barrio, Caballito.

The barbers is as much museum as it is barbers; the half of the barbers you can't see in this photo serves as a cafe, where the coffee is strong, the beer is cold and the wine is spine tinglingly awful; exactly as it should be. From the tiny piano in the back, every Friday evning, a tango show is put on for free anyone passing by and interested.

For 40$, about 11$US, you get the full shave which I swear is as close as I've been to a Zen Moment. You feel half way between the complete gentleman and the complete playboy. The wives were loving it.

The shave took about 20-25 minutes, all in. Long enough to sink into nirvana, and only a few seconds short of enough time for Señor Barnes to steal our wives.

Recommended, and warned.

Leah, Jardín

Each day, from 9.30 till 12-30, the noisiest one in the house goes to jardín, kinder, which is conveniently 10 metres from our front door. After her love affair with her previous jardín, San Benildo and her beloved Nancy, it was always going to be tricky for Construir to meet the warm, creative, groovesome standards we'd come to expect.

Well, little need to worry in Argie kinders. Leah skips out of school each day, strokes her teacher lovingly on the cheek, tells her she loves her, says ciao and proceeds to act out, sing and retell everything that has happened since morning time. A little in English, a little in Spanish, a lot in a whole new language which is kinda hope catches on, otherwise we've got some work to do.

At less than 100 quid a month, it's beyond a bargain; particularly as the original plan was 930 - 1230, but after a brief chat with Katie, they said it was fine for Leah to stay and have lunch and a siesta there too. Extra costs for the extra 2 hours? Six pesos. One British pound. Vamos.

Like her dad, the main focus of her school day is break time, when they have coffee and cake. Well, leche and a tita, milk and a biscuit. First thing we get told when she gets home? When, how, how many and what type of biscuits she had. Quite right too.

Romi, the teacher, gets a mention at least every few minutes in the afternoon, and usually gets a good night too. Her classmates are listed endless all afternoon and evening. A different bunch to my kindergarden in Girvan, all of whom were called John, I think, even the girls. Leah lists Pedro, Sofia, Lucas, Wenchi, Lorenzo - or rather Lolo - , Santi, Avril, Violeta, Carolina...

... all of whom celebrated Leah's birthday last week, as she'd 'missed' her birthday during the holidays, which provided her a wonderful opporuntity to be bossy, telling them all where to sit, how to sit, what to eat, when to eat it and how to present her with her present.

Photos above. Enjoy.

It's all about... you know... Hmm.

It's raining innuendo in my Year 7 classes at the moment. Bless them, but it's a worry. In Bog Standard Comp, London, there was no innuendo. It was blatant. Innocence is better, and funnier. This is from the last couple of lessons:

DF: Write any words that you think have positive connotations.

(Reading over the shoulder of a student) Sunshine, holidays, swimming pool, oral, Punta del Este...

DF: Same question. Shout out. Positive connotations?

Mariano: (shouting out, enthusiastically) Playboy!

Laughter. Mixed with embarrssment.

Mariano: (red) Sorry. PlayStation.

DF: What is the technique used when a writer us trying to tell you that something good is going to happen? Santiago, you know this, don't you?

Santi: (clueless, searching the emptiest part of this brain) Um...

DF: (promping) Begins with an F...

Santi: Ffff...

DF: Fore...

Santi: (Eureka moment) Foreplay!

Enough. Poor teens.

Running Man

I am a runner now.

The best thing about being a runner is that you get to use lots of new words. For example, I haven't had a meal or a drink of water for days now. I have, however, carbo-loaded and taken on fluids.

It also way better than cricket. You don't get all dressed up for nothing. No body comes up to you, 2 minutes into the race, and says, "Sorry, you're out, you have to sit out and watch for the rest of the day." And you can't drop a catch. And you don't have to explain what running is. And you're done by 10am, and you can go with your famly (who, unlike in cricket, are still talking to you) for brunch somewhere. They treat you like a hero because you ran for more than half an hour. It's lovely.

Furthermore, I get to wear shorts so skimpy they'd make a beach volleyballer blush.

Not to mention the value for money. For just $50 pesos you get a free hideous shirt, lots of new friends, all the Gatorade and water you can carry (3 bottles of each, if you hoard - this slows you down somewhat, and attracts odd looks from fellow competitors, but makes savvy financial sense), a free aerobics lesson (group warm up! 'Knees elbows, elbows knees') and approximately 2500 babysitters (at least, 2500 people who return your lost child back to you).

Bargain. Just do it, as we say.

Shambles

Left for work today in a bit of rush this morning.

I was standing in the lift, convinced there was something wrong. Was I wearing a belt? Yes. Was this tie ridiculous? No. What is wrong...

It wasn't until I got to the front door of the building that I realised I wasn't wearing any shoes.

Import Only

You know sometimes you go into a shop and ask for something that seems to you like a reasonable request, but seems to them like it is completely ridiculous?

This is sometimes because you are very ignorant of the subject, and the shopkeeper is very knowledgeable. This often happens in MAN'S PLACES like a garage or a hardware store. You might ask for one of those things for a light to go on. They start hauling out wiring and electrics, but you just meant a table.

Or you have a problem with your car, and they say, what seems to be the problem then? And you say, the engine's making a strange sound. And they say, like what? So you do an impression.

That look.

Well, this happened to me yesterday.

I was trying to buy a copy of Sony Vegas 9, a basic editing program for the school. I stopped in to a PC shop in Martinez.

After shuffling around for a minute, a guy ehind the counter asked me if he could help.

- Yeah, to you have any editing software programmes? I'm looking to buy Sony Vegas, or maybe Adobe...

He interrupted me a little.

- You mean, like, una copia neuva?

- Yeah.

- As in, a copy in the box?

- Er, yeah. With plastic and everything.

- But, you're gonna pay like $120US for that...

- Yes, I know...

- But... I can do you a copy for... on a disc, you know... (to his mate in the back) Juan? How much do we do...

- 12 pesos, Juan shouts from the back

- ... for 12 pesos, maestro...

- Yeah, I'm buying it for my school, so it kinda needs to be in a box.

- Ohh... Ahh... in that case, I mean, I'm thinking you're gonna have to... maybe search, on the web?... or try, like, down town... (to Juan) Juan? Where can you get... Yeah...?

And finally, to me, with a sense of certainty.

- Yeah. You're not from here? No. Well, they'll have those copies in your country. I think you'll have to get something imported.